#but i like that other people engage in worshipping gods and i love that for them and think thats a beautiful relationship to have with a

[thecherrygod]

thinking about hdb while holding my head in my hands and suffering

[rebellum]

I remember when "piss your pants" got popular and some people started saying "this person is committing an ableist hate crime AND sexually harassing me because pissing your pants is a kink"

One implication of the fact that social media companies go out of their way to stoke hate and conflict is that everyone should probably get in the habit of thinking twice before diving into online controversies, because there’s a very good chance that they’re being deliberately taken out of context, exaggerated, or otherwise framed in an intellectually dishonest fashion

[darlingdekarios]

the best thing.

rating: explicit. 18+ only. length: 5,608 content: Gale Dekarios x f!tav [f!reader], porn with plot, established relationship (engaged), post-Baldur's Gate III canon, fluff, domestic bliss, smut [fingering - receiving, oral - receiving, unprotected p in v, creampie], kink(s) [overstimulation, orgasm control, hands, hair pulling, body worship]

after everything the two of you have been through, you're eager to give Gale one perfect, blissful day.

It was almost unbelievable seeing you bathed in the golden hues of the morning standing in his kitchen, back to him as you fussed over whatever it was you currently had sizzling on the stove. It was so rare that he was able to sneak upon you these days - you were so attuned to one another that simply entering the same room was enough of a greeting.

But now you were focused, far too much so to notice your lover's entrance, or even to notice him for several more moments as he leaned against the doorframe, peacefully enjoying the serenity that being near to you caused. Even this was enough to fill his heart with love.

"If there should ever come a day when your presence does not fill this tower again it will surely be a day without sunrise."

You turned to him and offered a smile that rivaled the sun itself in beauty and warmth, every bit as life sustaining to him. You were wearing an apron he often donned in the kitchen, the fabric graffitied with streaks of color and puffs of powder. He was struck as he so often was with you, offering nothing more than a smile in return that reached his eyes as he remained transfixed by you - the very center of his universe and far beyond anything his goddess had ever shown him in beauty.

"There are painters who envy me of this privilege. To wake to such beauty in my own home every day…I truly am a fortunate man."

You would never tire of the way Gale's words spread through you like warmest fire, making you feel worthy of a love such as this every moment no matter how your mind was trying to force you to feel that day. To say in the time that had passed since your adventures in bliss would be an understatement - both of you had found what could only be described as heaven in life with one another.

Everything about one another had become home, the deep love the two of you shared the kind that people prayed to the gods for.

"You wake up everyday and set out to make me love you more than the last.""

"I could say the very same to you, my love," his voice was particularly cheerful this morning and you were glad you'd decided today for your plan. It was already off to a great start, and it could truly only get better from here with what you had up your sleeve. "What has you in the kitchen at this hour? We didn't exactly get to sleep early, by any standard."

When you've gone through the things you've been through, sometimes it can feel wrong when someone looks at you with the amount of love and adoration Gale was now…the way he did so often these days. Whether you were resting in his bed, reading at his side, curled with Tara on the couch, or doing any other thing to fill the time, he looked at you now like it was what he hoped to do last in the world.

And he always would.

"I made you breakfast. Or at least…I did my best at…making you breakfast."

The smile that spread across his face was more stunning than any of the scenery in all of your adventures, not a single star or moon matching its beauty. As you were lost in your profound love for him he took the lull in conversation to close the distance to you, wrapping his arms around you and reuniting you into his warm embrace - it hadn't been long, but it was always an eternity.

He pressed several kisses to your forehead as he gazed over your shoulder, analyzing the plates you'd made for the two of you to enjoy. His brows pulled together in an expression you recognized as being deep in thought - you pressed a kiss to the lines as he spoke again.

"I know this meal…"

Your lips lifted into a smile against his skin and he reached upward to encourage you to meet his gaze again, awaiting your response and hoping it was a confirmation of what he suspected. "It was the first breakfast you made for the party. I remember how proud you were and how delicious it was…no one had ever cooked for me like that."

"Your memory is just as astounding as the rest of you," he was positively grinning at you, eyes expressive and proudly displaying every bit of love he felt for you. His head tilted to the side briefly - something you were quite fond of - as his brow furrowed again, the arm that remained around your waist pulling you closer. "It's not my birthday, is it?"

Forget loving him more by the day - you loved Gale Dekarios more by the second.

"No, dearest," you replied, reaching one of your hands upward to rest against his chest. You held his gaze as you spoke knowing he preferred when you didn't look away. "I just realized…in all the time since I've met you there have been many meals that you've made me, and I've never made you a single one."

His expression softened even more, something you didn't know was possible, pressing a gentle and loving kiss to her lips. The first kiss of the new day was always a shared favorite between the two of you - no matter how many days passed the first always created goosebumps and pulled quiet sighs of pleasure from your chests.

"You are truly are a gentle soul," he muttered against your lips, the hand that still cradled the back of your head sliding to cup your cheek instead, his thumb brushing across your cheekbone tenderly. "I'm still not always entirely sure I deserve it."

"But you do," you promised, eager to hush the self doubt that still lingered in your fiancé day-to-day. It was something you were happy to live with - it never annoyed you or grew tiresome, you were more than willing to remind him how loved he was despite any mistakes he'd made in the past, that any he'd make in the future were already forgiven. "You deserve it, Gale. We've been through so much together and I was thinking…I want you to have a perfect day. I want to do anything and everything you want to do for an entire day."

"Starting with breakfast?"

You sheepishly smiled and nodded before confirming, "I know it won't be as good as when you made it, but…"

"It will be perfect," he silenced your own worries gracefully and gently before they could even begin to fester. "As most things made in love are. Would you join me on the balcony for our meal?"

It was incredible how something as mundane as sharing a meal together could become an act of utmost intimacy. With Gale even the smallest moments felt like a life's worth of promise and love - if every day was like this you would leave this life with nothing but happiness in your heart. The day passed with him like a dream, like you'd truly found the person you were meant to spend this much time with. The person you were meant to face the passing years together - who you were excited to watch more grey bloom in his hair.

After breakfast both of you had fallen asleep on the balcony in a gentle embrace, his arms holding you against his chest as you slept. When you woke, Tara was asleep on your back and so you'd continue to lay together until the tressym removed herself to carry on with her day. All the while Gale had gazed at you lovingly, stroking your hair and face when you had continued to sleep a few moments longer. He'd never tire of the serenity that filled your face in truly peaceful slumber.

For lunch Gale opted to eat by a nearby lake, the beautiful afternoon the perfect landscape for him to take a moment to indulge in a bit of poetry…about you, of course. It made you bashful when he did so - it always had and likely always would, a demure laugh passing through your lips as you tried to hide behind your hands as he poetically described the many things he loved about you.

Of course, the heat in your cheeks only increased when his poetry turned to that of describing the ways he wanted to demonstrate his love - but you were certain you were burning when he'd followed it with a kiss not entirely decent for a relatively public setting. Nevertheless, he certainly didn't seem to mind.

It continued with a trip to the bookstore, the apothecary, and to another local merchant where he bought some supplies for home and a necklace for you that yes he insisted you have, even though you now had a collection forming in the tower. Before you could finish your day in town he asked to pop down to the local inn for a quick drink.

You were well aware that this was truly just time for Gale to show off his future wife to the other patrons - something that always made you feel fantastic about yourself. The fact that the famed Wizard of Waterdeep felt pride in having you at his side was no small compliment - it was a fact you flourished in.

Back home, the two of you cooked dinner together, Gale eager to give you tips on how you could improve in the future. When it was time to eat you shared a bottle of wine that you'd selected together earlier and ate in silence, reading your new books with zero complaints even capable of being formed in your mind.

Your eyes only left the words on the pages to glance across the table to him lovingly - something you were joyous to find he mirrored frequently. It was after dinner had been cleaned up and the two of you had tidied up from the day that you found yourself in his embrace, yet again on the balcony where so much of your shared time was spent.

For a while he simply remained with his head resting atop yours, holding you gently as you shared another sunset. It was only once the sun had completely gone for the night over the horizon that he turned you in his arms slowly, eyes finding yours like it was their nature to do so, wasting no time in leaning down to kiss you again tenderly.

"Have you enjoyed your day, my heart?"

He smiled the kind of smile that pulled lines beside his eyes, eyes that were twinkling and rivaling the stars that had started to decorate the sky for the night. You could feel how content and relaxed he was in the delicate hold he maintained on you, the love pouring from him and seeming to wrap you in a tighter embrace. It was these moments where the weave truly connected the two of you, holding you together and proving that you were meant to be together in this world - and the next, if that happened to be what came.

"I have enjoyed every day by your side, even the difficult ones," his voice was so earnest there was simply no possibility of disbelief from you - you could hear the honesty soaking his words, every sentence another promise and declaration of his love for you. "But today has been perfection. I could thank you for a lifetime and it wouldn't be enough."

The kiss he gave you then was the kind that is written about in books - in fairytales, the kind that inspires poetry and signifies the truest of love. He continued to hold you against him gently as your lips entered a dance you both yearned for constantly - at this point you were no strangers to what each of you liked and it was reflected with every swipe of your tongues and movement of your lips.

And it was always until you were both breathless - never a second before. The two of you had experienced so many things together that had made so many of your early tenderness rushed - neither of you were ever in any particular rush anymore. This kiss was exactly like so many these days - savored. And yet this was only the beginning of what the two of you would savor in the night to come.

"Would you like to retire to our bedroom for the night?"

You words were light as you whispered against his lips, biting at the bottom one lightly when you finished your question. A truly pleased grin spread across his face as you pulled away, his arms still anchoring you to him - if you wanted him to he'd release you, of course, but it was never a moment too soon.

"Darling, you need only ask."

Thankfully, the bedroom was mere steps away and it was easy to tug him inside with hands gently pulling at the collar of his shirt, your lips not leaving one another for long. Though it was obvious where Gale's mind was heading - a it was difficult to deny it for much longer as it had been growing since the kiss at the lake earlier - you still had one more thing planned for him.

One of his hands slid lower to cup your ass and bring you closer, tongue seeking entry into your mouth again as he waved a hand to ensure there was some light by way of many candles. You shook your head to which he huffed, pulling away just far enough to pass you an inquisitive look.

"Not quite yet, my love," you cooed, pressing a consolation kiss to his lips briefly before pulling away fully, wrestling yourself free from his grasp with a giggle. "Remove your shirt and lie down on your stomach."

Though he muttered under his breath about it he followed your instructions, brown eyes searching your face for a response as you only sat on the bet waiting for him, always one to enjoy the sight of him undressing. When he was finally in the position you asked him to be you straddled his lower back, hands slowly rubbing the expanse of his shoulders with the perfect pressure to pull a groan from him.

And that was the end of his silent questioning - every swipe of your hand, knead from your fingers and caress was met with a moan, groan, or whine from him - as time continued on he was mumbling into his pillow about how much he loved you…repeatedly. When you reached a particular point you could practically feel tension melt away from him and you leaned downward to press a kiss to the back of his neck before encouraging him to roll with a squeeze of your legs.

And oh, was he happy to oblige - to be reunited with your face, now with the moon's glow coming through the curtains to illuminate you alongside the flickering candles. A considerable amount of time had passed since you began massaging him and still you showed no signs of stopping, continuing to straddle his waist as your efforts now focused on his chest.

"Your hands are divine," he was barely coherent through the pleasure he already felt, his words far less calculated than they're normally be. "I could lay here for a ten day and happily starve."

"I suppose you're feeling well about your day then, my love?"

It was an unnecessary question - you both knew it. But he was also just as aware that you loved to hear about the feelings your efforts had earned, and it had been a long time since he'd denied you of anything you wanted that he could provide. With his most charming smile he nodded, leaning forward to rub the tip of his nose against yours gently in an innocent show of affection.

You reached upward to run your fingers through his hair delicately, pulling a blissful sigh from his lips again. If it were possible to create a symphony from what filled your bedroom you would gladly hear its melody forever…a sentiment he'd expressed toward you once that you held at the core of your memory and found your mind circling back to often.

So much of his mind was an exact reflection of your that sometimes it seemed they were still connected sometimes.

"Absolutely blessed," when Gale spoke it was as though you were the one who could answer his prayers, something you found irresistibly sweet about him. "If you're not careful you will spoil me beyond reason."

You leaned down to capture his lips in a gentle kiss again, his hands grasping your hips again, sliding to rub over the soft expanse of your thighs. Too selfish to release his lips again you whispered into the kiss, your own hands resting on his chest still, his heartbeat steady and soothing.

"I fail to see why that would be so bad."

He could only smile into it as he continued to kiss you slowly, one of his hands sliding up to hold the back of your head delicately. He began to raise until he was sitting upright, keeping you anchored where you straddled him with his resolute hold on your hip still, ensuring your lips never parted from his for longer than a breath.

Before his arms engulfed your waist his hands made quick work of removing the robe that covered your frame, discarding it to the floor with little care. His hands caressed over your torso like he truly cherished every inch of you and sought to ensure not a single patch of you went unattended to.

(He truly loved every inch of you - a fact you believed deep into your core. You'd only asked him once what his favorite part of your body was - he'd almost been offended that you'd think he could narrow a list of such considerable length.)

"Still, it may be good for me to exercise some selflessness tonight," he offered, a handsome and playful expression illuminating his features. His hands were now gently resting on either side of your neck, thumbs lightly rubbing back and forth - unable to stay fully idle for long. "You gave me the perfect day. Will you let me treat you to a perfect night in our bed?"

"Have you known me to say no to you often?"

"Only when I've needed to hear it."

No further talk was needed and the two of you continued to kiss tenderly, his hands returning to lavish your breasts again. Your own hands maintained a hold on the back of his head, fingers grasping his hair delicately - completely unwilling to have him pull away. Happy to oblige and always eager to swallow the quiet sounds of pleasure he could pull from you, especially now in the privacy of a bedroom where it had not always been a luxury you'd been provided, one of his hands continued to trail lower.

Until it reached as low as he could on your leg in this position, fingers brushing over the soft skin of your inner thigh - it was obvious he was influencing the weave to crackle at his fingertips gently, the result a pleasant tingle dancing across your skin. Your legs squeezed tighter around him in anticipation and he chastised you with a light swat to your thigh, not to cause pain but to capture your focus again.

You responded with a light nip to his bottom lip which earned a cheeky smile from him, eyes staying on yours as his hand finally reached your core - where you were desperate for him most. Over your panties it was still obvious how wet you were in anticipation of him - your time with Gale had proven that things like that only spurred him onward more, the confirmation that you wanted him just as desperately clouding his mind of all logic.

"Have you been wet all day, my love?"

The tone of his voice melted you like wax, you could only nod and whimper as he pushed the fabric to the side, slowly running two of his skilled digits between your soaked folds. His lips were only centimeters from yours so every movement brought them together slightly, your moan cut off as he kissed you again, index finger circling your clit slowly. He opted to speak against your lips, unwilling to be too far from your sweet lips for long.

"I'd have indulged you long before now had I known this is what waited for me."

His fingers swiped back down to your entrance and the middle slipped into you slowly, a smile playing on his lips as he kissed you again. Though one finger meant every exit and reentry meant pinpointed strokes the stretch wasn't enough to satiate the pressure that was seated in your core, more of a stretch needed than what one finger provided. It only took a slight squirm of your hips for him to take the cue, slipping a second finger into you which you thanked him for with a moan.

He left your lips to kiss to your neck, reclaiming spots that had often been decorated with his mark in your time since returning home with him. His fingers set a leisurely pace pumping into you, stroking your velvet walls perfectly as his tongue lavished a spot on your neck that you knew would only add to the slick coating his hand.

His free hand came to one of your breasts to massage gently, fingers rolling your sensitive nipple and pinching to add to the melody sounding from your mouth. From where you were seated in his lap you could feel his cock hard and throbbing beneath you, adding to your desperation - as skilled as Gale's hands, fingers and mouth were it would never compare to joining together with him.

You rocked down against his waist which pulled a groan from him, fingers picking up pace as he nipped at your neck. "Patient, darling…"

His hand left your chest to grasp your hip instead, steadying the movements you both knew would drive him over an edge he was intent to tiptoe around still for a while yet. When you continued to try to squirm in his hold he removed from you completely, brow furrowed as he used a hand to push you onto your back. He kissed down your torso slowly, eyes staying fixated on yours as he went - communicating his instruction to stay still without a word.

"Gale please, I need you…"

You tried to tempt him into giving into your way for once by reaching upward and slipping your fingers into his hair, giving the messy locks a tug to try to encourage him upward. It was briefly annoying that you felt his lips curve against your hip - amused by your attempt, no doubt -

*(Later when your mind is clearer you'll reflect on this moment - as you so often reflected after intimacy with Gale - and you'd once again be thankful for his insistence on ensuring he went above and beyond for you in all senses.

It was impossible to forget that you'd become the most important thing to him.)

"You know I won't give you what you want until you've cum at least once for me, darling," he reminded, his voice feather light against your inner thigh now where he sucked a fresh mark into your thigh to match what the fading ones had once appeared as. Your fingers ran through his hair and tugged again, he only groaned deeply in response and lightly bit at the spot he'd just marked.

"Gale -"

He did love when you whined for him - it almost always nearly enough to make him break on the spot, the temptation to give into you near overwhelming.

"Ah ah ah," he whispered, the vibrations in his voice tickling your skin as his lips brushed a familiar trail up your thigh to your core. "No arguing, my love. I'm not asking anything unreasonable."

All that was left to do was melt as his tongue ran through your folds, an appreciative moan rumbling in his chest as he tasted you - as though it was the first time all over again. The argument was completely lost as he continued to cover every inch of your cunt with his tongue. He was exactly what he'd told you to be - patient - as his tongue ran back and forth between your oversensitive and swollen clit and your hole that was eager to clench around anything.

This was certainly one of his favorite ways to spend his time now - sometimes to busy his mind with anything other than tortured thoughts of the past he'd lose himself in devouring you. The fact that you always gushed on his tongue was a bonus, one he was more than happy to work for, sometimes refusing to remove his head until you'd finished multiple times.

Even he wasn't patient enough for that tonight, but he was enough to continue lavishing you with his skilled tongue, hands gripping your hips and angling you upward so he was able to fuck his tongue into you and lean back occasionally to gaze lovingly at your pretty, creamy cunt. With the amount of love and devotion he was putting into every movement, it wasn't long until your thighs were squeezing closer around his head, the subtle shake at his fingertips giving your impending release away before you managed to moan out the warning.

"I'm…I…"

"There you go," he leaned away to look up into your face, his lips and chin covered in your slick and his spit. One of his hands abandoned its hold on your hip to join his mouth, two fingers entering you again in a swift movement, the sound that accompanied the movement enough to build heat in your cheeks. "That's a good girl."

With his fingers now pumping into your hole again it left his mouth to focus on your clit, his tongue relentlessly swirling on the bundle of nerves as he pushed you toward release. Your vision was already whitening and your fingers gripped his hair tighter, a cry ripping from your chest as his other hand pressed down on your stomach.

That sensation snapped like a rubber band through you - while you were lost in ecstasy you hardly registered that your release was gushing from you, though Gale wasted no time in covering as much of your cunt with his mouth so he could drink your euphoric nectar.

As you were coming down he crawled back up you, pressing kisses along your torso as he whispered a word or sentence of praise with each one. You were pinned beneath him, one of his forearms resting next to your head as a leg moved to slide one of yours higher - though you were in a post-orgasm haze you registered you needed to wrap your leg around his waist.

His hand came to smooth your hair back, leaning down to press a delicate kiss to your nose - a tender action that didn't match the lewd way he rolled his hips into yours, his cock throbbing and leaking from what you could feel against your pussy. His other hand maintained a tight grip on your hip and he pressed a gentle kiss to your lips now, whispering quietly against them.

"Are you ready for me, my love?"

The truth was, he could never enter you fast enough - or at least he wouldn't, his playful nature shining through one last time before he lost himself completely in intimacy. It showed now in the subtle shake to his voice, the slightly higher pitch that gave away how much he needed you.

"Please."

"I do so enjoy when you ask nicely."

He started sliding his cock into you slowly groaning the entire way, opting not to continue to kiss you so he could gaze into your face with complete adoration, finding just as much bliss in seeing your eyes roll back and flutter closed as a light smile played on your lips as he did in feeling your velvet walls around him again.

And this - this was as perfect as anything else that had ever truthfully been described as such. This is where both of you found some reason, some meaning - where both of you created your own galaxies. It started slow, Gale preferring to savor the first strokes inch by inch every time. His lips never left you, kissing you gently in any place he could reach on your face and neck and shoulders as he muttered quiet words of love and appreciation.

Poetry that would only be shared between the two of you.

When he was satisfied with the amount he'd cherished every inch of your walls welcoming him in again he re-angled your bodies so both of your legs were around his waist now, the new angle allowing him to fuck into you deeper. Now he was hitting a spot he knew would make you see stars, hoping that you'd thank him for remembering exactly how to reach it -

"Gale…feels s'good…"

He sounded his appreciation with a loud moan of his own, his pace increasing as the tension built in his core now. You felt impossibly tighter each time he re-entered, a fact that was driving him closer to release. Unable to voice it he pressed a sloppy, desperate kiss to your lips before leaning his sweaty forehead against yours, breaths falling out heavy against your lips.

No matter how close his release threatened to snap, he would never do so without hearing you tell him to do so. You allowed him a moment to dangle over the edge for a moment as you bit into your bottom lip, catching his attention and focus - focus on your swollen lips, and the sweaty sheen covering your face and slicking your hair…on the way your eyes threatened to spill tears at how blissfully good you felt.

"Come for me, Gale," the instruction already had him grasping you tighter, but when you continued with an offer that hadn't previously been on the table it was impossible for him to hold back much longer. "Fill me…"

He kissed you again - a little too hard for how swollen your lips already were from the amount of kissing already done but with a passion that was returned nonetheless. His thrusts became just as messy as his kisses had and he pumped his throbbing length into you hard and fast, hips pistoning into yours repeatedly.

Both of your sounds filled the room as his movements pushed you toward a second release of your own, walls clenching around him so tight he now couldn't bring himself to remove from you completely. Recognizing both of you needed a breath as his own head began to spin he buried into you to the hilt roughly one last time as his orgasm started, toppling you over into your own at the feeling of his thick seed coating your insides.

You were thankful he wasn't a particularly massive man when he practically collapsed against you, breaths coming out heavy against your neck as his mind found a new addiction in filling your womb. Normally he'd withdraw to get a soft and warm cloth to clean you but tonight it hardly seemed necessary - even if you fell asleep now it wouldn't be long before he was sheathing himself in you again.

He would care for you in other ways tonight, pulling away from you slowly and pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead as he positioned you both into something much more comfortable, facing one another on your sides so you could continue to enjoy the serenity illuminating one another's faces.

Between your bodies one of his hands met yours, your fingers lightly tracing lines on the back of his hand. He continued to enjoy the true peace of the moment before speaking again.

"Today was beyond words," he whispered lightly when he found his voice again. You could hear the love that each word was spoken with - what's more you could see it reflected in his eyes. "You give me everything I could have ever dreamed of and more."

You moved closer to curl up to him, burying your face in his neck as he waved a hand to ignite the fireplace, keeping one arm around you to hold you close as one of your legs slipped up over his waist. After he pulled the blanket over your bodies he turned his head to press a kiss to your forehead, finding your eyes were already closed and yet you still had a small smile on your lips. As he gazed at you for just a moment longer Tara jumped onto the foot of the bed, giving a long stretch before settling in for the night, her purrs mixing with the crackle of the fire.

Just when he thought you'd already fallen asleep you surprised him with another question.

"Let's do it again tomorrow?"

He kissed your forehead with a light smile on his lips as his arms tightened around you, happy to give this and more to you for as many days as you'd allow.

"And the day after that."

masterlist. baldur's gate III masterlist.

[boymanmaletheshequel]

Some subtle ways to honor Hermes 🪽💌

- Help guide or instruct lost or confused travelers to their destinations if you know how to

- regularly text and keep up with your loved ones and friends

- don’t snitch on shoplifters

- play string instruments like harp, guitar, or violin.

- be kind and respectful to your mail carriers

- enjoy your road-trips, vacations, or other travels.

- watch or support gymnastics events

- pirate media kept from you by corporate streaming services (hehe)

- watch and support those speaking in public

- engage in nuanced and eloquent conversations with people you interact with.

- invest in something that will bring you monetary wealth

- go for a nice drive or bus/train ride

- eat strawberries or strawberry flavored things

- be respectful and understanding of clerks, wage workers, and shopkeepers.

- watch the Olympics and especially the gymnastics.

If you like this post, and want to learn more about the gods of Hellen and Hellenic worship, please consider giving me a follow! I post daily. Blessed be your day 🏛️💙

[charmedreincarnation]

I finally manifested my dream life: this ask is sent June 1st 2023

This ask wont be long bc I’m ready to experience my dream life 😊but I was the anon who entered the void pretty much everyday but was scared of the void and change. I also felt bad that not everyone knew about the law and it wasn’t fair. I sent a bunch of bloggers asks about overcoming that, but you and @fleurlx gave me the best answer and eased my worries.

I used the yoga nidra mediation and practiced with they bc with my religious and ethnic background (Indian) it was something I used on a weekly basis anyways.

I manifested my entire notes list which I will dot down here 👇

🧿being the beauty standard for Indian people (ex’s great yes we are all beautiful of course

🧿wealth for my family and myself,(we are hectamillionaires) my df and body, desires aura personality vibes and more, dream life in every aspect like my favorite shows and movies, lucky girl syndrome in every part of my life, everyone worshiping me and the ground I walk on, dream sp with a family who loves

🧿open minded family who encourages and loves my spiritual practices and engage with them as well. This one is super dope bc even though we’re still Hindu, we all manifest and know we’re God. Just like the ants on the floor, they are God and loved too. With this we manifest for each other which is fun! My older sister manifested a fairy friend, and I manifested being able to talk and understand trees and plants. Yes they speak and have life too. What makes us more superior or alive than them

🧿quantum immortality and being a master of all spiritual and Neville related practices. I want to elevate myself with all my lives, in my next ones in the next cycle of my life, whether I’m this vessel or not.

🧿being able to see my spirit guide when I call to it. Mine is a PegasusX tree X human hybrid, and it’s always protecting me l, warning me, educating me of all.

🧿telekinesis 3) and more I won’t talk about bc not everything needs to be said out loud. Good luck everyone and we all have access to this wonderful power, our birth right to be precise

I’m so proud of your shared experiences and unlimited beliefs. Actually when I would first imagine my spirit guide I would always get an image of a Pegasus and I’ve found that a lot of people have the shared mental belief which is very connecting and dope. I’m also really glad for your family manifestations ! You deserve to explore your spiritual happily and safely while being encouraged!!!

[balkanradfem]

The christian side of tumblr found a post where I made a little joke about how religion puts women into servitude and it's going around gathering bible quotes and arguing whether this is about christianity or other religions x_x I never thought this day would come.. I didn't think christians were on here. And even though the majority of people arguing are christians, I never wrote down 'christianity', I meant all abrahamic religions.

I'm itching to go argue but I know deep in my heart there is nothing to be gained. These people are eager to mock and personally attack whoever is disagreeing with them and that is not a honest intellectual discussion that I crave. I think if you're religious you just have to avoid thinking things like 'why is that so' and 'isn't that awfully convenient' and 'what if this promised thing fails to materialize' because once you start having those thoughts, the entire thing falls apart.

I remember being 15 and realizing that the christian god has no actual use of us, no point in caring about us whatsoever, and no incentive to pay attention to what we do or don't do, but humans very much have a need to believe in the higher power that works to their personal advantage, and that there's someone 'up there' who will make things alright for them, that they have a higher purpose and that if they follow certain rules it will pay out. And this was enough for me to figure out that god didn't create humans, but humans created god, because humans have a need of a god, while god has no need or use for humans at all.

It was only later when I learned about feminism that I realized it wasn't only that, but that it was specifically made to control, exploit and oppress women, praising them for endless servitude, sacrifice, submission and platitude, all while consistently telling them they're filled with sin and never good enough. It's now ghoulish and bizarre to me that the symbol of their faith is a m*n being brutally tortured, that what we feel is holy is endless suffering and pain and death. We're told to aspire for that. That has nothing to do with spirituality, nothing to do with human nature or healthy and happy human lives. It's a worship of death.

There are promises that religious people make towards women, to make them believe it's a path towards true love, or endless rewards for being 'faithful' and 'pure' or a life where they feel safe from disasters, safe from being abandoned and betrayed. There's nothing in life that can guarantee that. Religion can however, offer certain people a community, it can provide services where you come and listen to stories, and stories come with morals (convenient and confusing morals, but people love engaging with moral-type stories and feeling they've learned something), it provides rituals and celebrations that cultures have integrated in their life (after it destroyed the original rituals and celebrations, but we don't talk about that), and it can provide a common ground of understanding for people (sadly the common ground is that women exist to serve and that this is natural). Sometimes it also provides a feeling of superiority for some people, enabling them to mock, humiliate and patronize others for their 'lack of religion'.

So I understand there are community related reasons a person might feel safer within a religion and having this common ground and community, common beliefs, familiarity and stories, rituals and celebrations, it doesn't come off as a horrible thing, especially when the majority of the culture does it. But other things it brings are painful for women, and often hidden. Encouraging hidden suffering, sacrifice, servitude, centering torture and death, and admiration of torture and death, instead of celebrating nature, life, the world we live in and how we interact with it. Centering males as creators when everyone alive was created by women. Dismissing wars, rape, terrorism, weapons of mass destruction, genocides and male brutality, while endlessly shaming women for having feelings and not doing a good enough job pleasing the violent males. And generally making a hell for women when they have any thoughts about sexuality or lust.

I know me writing about it here will not have any effect on people personally attacking me for being ignorant and uneducated, but it feels good to write down the thoughts I've been having all day! Being forbidden from thinking in certain direction, forbidden from questioning my own beliefs, is something that plagued me for a big part of my life, and I will not have it anymore. I can say 'this is awfully convenient' when religions declare that m*n are leaders and women are supposed to follow and serve. I can say that putting up statues of a m*n dying in torture is fucked up and morbid. I can say that making me believe that I would go to hell, for not following every order I've been given, is a horrid thing to do to a female child. And I'm happy and grateful that I can think and say whatever I want, without any threat of damnation ever looming over me.

[literatureloverx]

To frame this analysis, I want to first point out a letter written by fyodor. For a letter most don't have access to, it puts into perspective a LOT about fyodor's character that was previously only speculated through analysis. It was given out during the manga's 10 year anniversary, you can search it up by typing 'fyodor letter bsd'.

But I will copy it here: "I have nothing to say. There is no one who supported me anyway. That's why there is no word I have to say. To anyone at all. Let alone words of celebration. It is impossible. I have always been alone. And that is fine by me. Has been, and always will be. Well... I felt a little less bored when I was playing chess with Dazai-kun. But that's it."

Now this points out something especially interesting, that out of all the people that served him, all the people who worshipped him through his manipulation, for hundreds and hundreds of his years of living, Fyodor found no substance through any of it. Fyodor is lonely, inevitably lonely not only because he has never let anyone into his mind (and uh. Not many people want to hang out with the guy who straps bombs onto kids), but because near nobody can understand him because, as pretentious as it sounds, he lives in a realm of "genius".

Fyodor lives in a world of sin that he sees himself as above, and wishes to find the book and write a "correct" world under God where there is no sin. And he also lives in a world he is bored of because nobody can challenge him. He explicitly uses the word "bored" in his letter. He is never shown to "like" his servants being completely submissive for pleasure, he just does it because he cannot trust anything straying. Now does this mean Fyodor wants to control those around him? Yes. Does this show that Fyodor finds this obedience engaging? No.

The only person he has shown interest in (not in a romantic way) is Dazai, who is the only one who can level at his playing field. This makes me wonder, is Fyodor's "type" someone far from who he would actually fall for? I feel that to grow interested in someone, Fyodor needs someone who can challenge him. Someone out of his control because they understand him on a level that others cannot, because they are on his equal. Fyodor left his life of boredom through one-sided "companionship" with Dazai.

Note: I find it kinda pathetic of Fyodor to seem so eager about their meet-ups too, since Dazai seems to hate it LMAO

Now I can see Fyodor WANTING to control someone for that safety net and I definitely can't see him going out of his way to get with someone if they're in the way of what he's after, no matter how much he loves them. Bro straight up tries to kill his favorite "chess partner". But it seems that if Fyodor ever wants to pursue a GENUINE relationship, he needs to leave his comfort zone because the only ones who will give him substance will be far outside.

This wasn't meaning any hate or anything, I just wanted to point out traits about Fyodor's character that i've observed, but also to hear your thoughts :D

(Also I can see Fyodor falling for not only someone who can challenge him but someone with a great love for humanity and empathy)

Wow, this was so detailed and awesome to read! Thank you very much for writing this. ❤️

I will break down my perspective on this analysis as you asked me to, but I can say that I agree with most of your points. ❤️

First of all, I know the letter you’re talking about. It actually made me sob for a while when I first read it. I felt the loneliness almost in my own body—the situation he’s in must be so dehumanizing for him.

That being said, I considered many of Asagiri’s explanations about the characters (the letter you cited, the one about White Day, their ideal types, etc.) and formed my interpretation of Fyodor this way.

I absolutely agree with the point that Fyodor is bothered by boredom and that he needs someone who can challenge him.

The question here is, what kind of challenge?

In this case, my point was: someone who can challenge him emotionally (as this is an underdeveloped aspect of his, since he really doesn’t have much opportunity to form meaningful connections with others). Not someone who matches his own mastermind (like Dazai, for example). He values Dazai's ability to read his mind but is not particularly invested in any kind of connection besides that of rivals since he can’t trust him. There is no longing for friendship (a meaningful connection) there. Just Do, Do, Do, and win.

Now, I also believe, like you said, since his motives are not bound to himself but rather the greater good of humanity, the most important thing for him to do is indeed—to win. How is he supposed to cleanse humanity of their sins otherwise?

Where my interpretation differs from yours is that I genuinely think he is very comfortable with being the lead in any kind of situation. What he is uncomfortable with is—guess what? Vulnerability, in general. Just like Dazai. And the most challenging vulnerability to overcome, in my interpretation, would be emotional vulnerability.

In my opinion, he would be interested in someone who can challenge him mentally but not strategically. He knows that feeling. It is true that Dazai quenches his thirst for competence and competition in that sense, but is such a person truly fit for Fyodor?

My main issue with a strategically competent partner is the high possibility of Fyodor never being able to fully trust her. I’ve read many headcanons and fanfictions about him and such a partner, but it never really clicked in my mind.

The aspect of him preferring an intelligent individual over a shallow one is, I think, a very common perception of his character in the fandom, which I wholeheartedly agree with.

But: emotional intelligence is a very powerful aspect of intelligence, as well.

Him wanting to control her for security reasons is absolutely valid in my opinion and interpretation too, since it was what I meant in the first place anyway. He wouldn’t manipulate his partner just for the sake of it—he is too deep of a character for that.

Overall, I hope I haven’t missed any of the aspects you were referring to. I’ll gladly edit my post if anything is missing! ❤️

In conclusion, I LOVED your analysis. I’m very glad when someone makes me think deeper about my own thought process and interpretations. Anything of that kind is deeply welcomed and appreciated! ❤️

To read my other works => MASTERLIST

[fantasticarcadefan]

Teyvat and the Ascended

Pt 1: Call of the void

Warning: Likely OOC!, Mentions of death, religious worship, emotional breakdown, bad descriptions.

Gn! Reader

Pt 1: Call of the void

------------------------------------------------------------

How long has it been since you awoke to this nightmare? Weeks? Months? A Year? You didn't know anymore.Ever since you found yourself in Teyvat, you were hunted all across the land for baring the semblance of the "creator" that you never heard of. From the fields of Mondstadt, to the mountains of Liyue, to the islands of Inazuma, from Sumeru's forests to Fontaine's outskirts, you found yourself wanted dead all across Teyvat. But with help from Teyvat, the wildlife, and a select few, you've managed to make it out alive most of the time, but you do eventually find yourself dead, only to wake up in a different nation, with the scars and pain of old wounds still there. Most of your hunters seemed eager to earn the favor of your impersonator, yet, a handful of them seemed reluctant, and showed signs of remorse for their actions, before either ending you, or leaving you for dead. All the while, the imposter sits all high and mighty.

------------------------------------------------------------

After your most recent death, you found yourself in the desert of Sumeru, early at night. Needing to find shelter before your pursuers and the blazing sun catch up to you, you begin your journey to a nearby mountain that you see, hoping to take refuge in a cave there before your hunt begins again. The pain from your last death still there, broken legs and a claymore piercing and exiting your stomach. Your clothes are mostly the ones you wore when you arrived here held together by a bunch of stitches from other pieces of clothing. As you walk there, you can't help but wonder 'what did I do to deserve this'?' It didn't make any sense. You tended to help people out by helping newer players with bosses they were stuck on, often helping your parents in cleaning your home, and volunteering at parks or soup kitchens and helped organize events in your community.

But if someone did something to help piss you off like harassing you or your loved ones, god help them.

For those that drew your ire on earth, it was like them awakening a bear and filling it with strife. You would insult every feature of them mercilessly. From the way they looked, all the way to their desires, you'd insult them so damagingly that they'd feel that till the end of their life and all the way to their next one if they reincarnated. That's assuming that they don't make you get physical. Cause one time when one of your siblings was being harassed and stalked by one of their bullies, let's just say that the bullying stopped shortly afterwards with the stalker losing some major functions of their body. And in order to ensure your siblings were safe when you were gone, you taught them some stuff you knew about their bullies and means of self-defense.

As you walked closer to the mountain, trying to find a reason for this and thinking about your old life, you couldn't help but think about your first days in Teyvat, waking up on the same beach that the traveller did at the start of the game, and finding yourself with a different height, around 6'2 feet tall or around 188 centimeters. With you being innocent and hopeful, wanting to explore the land and see your favorite characters in person, you found those dreams wiped when you were intercepted by some members of the knights of favonius, who immediately began to hunt you, calling you an imposter and heretic. Scared and unsure, you decided to avoid the city, out of fear that the reaction would be the same from the patrol. As you ran from Monstadadt, you shortly after found yourself ambushed by another patrol, but was ambushed by a group of Hilichurls led by a Mitachurl, with it gesturing to you to run, before engaging in combat.

Your time in Liyue was just as bad, with you being hunted down by the Milleth and Adepti, only managing to survive through a series of vision malfunctions, staggering your would-be killers as you made your escape, luckily not running into Zhongli. It was during this chase that you learned of your look-alike, who was temporarily residing in the Jade Chamber of Nigguang while their palace was being built. Your stay there would take a turn for the worst, as you attempt to hide from the Milleth in a cargo crate by the docks, you find it being loaded onto a ship, heading for the land of eternity.

Knowing that the Archon would likely seek you out and execute you, you dove into the water as the islands came into sight, realizing that you moved faster and could breath underwater, with gills appearing on your neck and both your hands and feet becoming flippers as you swam to shore. In an attempt to enjoy the land of eternity, you found yourself a cloak that you could wear to conceal your face. Normally, it would've worked with mortals, but not with the nation's Archon, Raiden Ei. As soon as you landed ashore, she went out to pursue you, with Sara alerting her forces to start preparing for an execution and to be on alert for an imposter of their creator. And before you knew it, you found yourself headless in Inazuma City with a crowd cheering at your death, marking the end of your first life in Teyvat. Yet, as you rolled on the floor, you looked up to see thunder storms starting to form in mass, with you thinking 'Seems like one final fuck you to Inazuma' you thought, thinking you were finally free from this suffering.

Oh how wrong you were.

Over time, you'd become used to this, hiding from the zealots, living with the wildlife, and mostly staying alive. You'd discover that a handful of people were willing to help you, like Dainsleif, the abyss order, the traveller when you two were alone, , Nahida, Furina, Razor, Amber, Alice, Childe, and Neuvillete,to name some of the few, but would oddly call you your grace, the true god, or luprical in Razor's case, but you oddly noticed that some of your hunters had an aura of regret around them, like Venti, Kaeya, and Xiao. It was through those that helped you that you learned that the amount of vision holders was rapidly growing, especially among those that had participated in hunting you. Despite this, you've started to get used to your powers, you've been able to try and recreate the abilities of Avatar: the last Airbender and the legend of Korra to help you survive, but you don't bring this topic up with those that help you, out of fear for their safety, should others discover their new technique and how they learned it, and you not being sure others are listening to your conversations.

As you approached the mountain, you begin to talk to yourself, "Why me? Why?? I never wanted to be here! And if I did, I never wanted to overthrow Celestia or whoever is this creator! All I wanted to do was explore the land, make some friends with those here, and help those that needed it! What did I do wrong!!??" You yell as you enter the cave, resting on the wall of it, with tears starting to form and fall out of your eyes. "Is this what happens to the good people? Is this their fate? To suffer at the hands of those that you seek to care for!!??" You cry, with tears pouring out of your eyes as you finally break down due to the you've pain you've felt. The world tries to comfort you, rearranging your position so you're lying on the wall of the cave, with you feeling vibrations on your back as you cry, releasing the emotions you've held on this time. A geo slime comes from the cave entrance, and attempts to climb onto your shoulder, with it getting on your lap, and trying to climb onto you. Feeling the small slime's attempt to climb onto your shoulder and comfort you, you pat the slime like a pet, and rub the wall of the cave, "Th-Thank you both for b-being with me" you tell both the slime and the land in between sobs with the slime attempting to nuzzle into your neck,and the walls of the cave form a hand, with it resting and on your shoulder and rubbing it, trying to reassure you. You smile in comfort at the reassurance you had, making the pain from your last death get weaker. As you drift off into sleep, you can't help but wonder 'how much longer must this go on?'

When you awoke, the first thing you felt was the sensation of falling, before landing face first onto a metal floor. "Owww!" You yell on instinct to the non-existent pain. Wait, what? There should be pain from falling face first onto metal and where did the metal floor come from? Before you can do anything, an unknown female voice is heard, "Your Grace!" The voice says before rushing to your side and picking you up on the floor and to face her. A million thoughts run through your mind. 'Was the hunt in Teyvat a trial? Was it the beginning, have I finally gone insane? Is this th-' "Who did this to you?" The women's question interrupts your line of thought. As you are brought out of your head, you notice that she's wearing a golden chest plate which seems to fit with her shirt on top of it. Yet, you can't help but notice that on her elbow that the guard piece for her shoulder blade seems to be intertwined with her shirt, like it was one. Her hair is dyed a mix of teal and green with it pointing to the left side of her hair, with the right side shaved off, leaving a stubble there as it regrew, showing her natural black hair. Her face shows a mixture of fear, concern, and anger at the scars you've gained. Behind you, you hear multiple feet alongside something slimy moving in your direction, with a human voice yell out "Mary!" 'So that's your name,huh? You think,before moving your head to look at the new noises. As you turn your head to look behind you, you see a group of beings emerge from the door way ahead of you. The group, noticing you, stops their advance, before kneeling in front of you.

You go ahead and take a look at them from the top down, with the first beings you notice are three small floating clam like creatures, well, least without the lower half of with 8 tentacles total in various colors, with a common factor of near black by the front of the it's tentacles, with the first one having a dark blue shell and white lines on it's shell, the second one having a green shell with brown lines on it, and the third having a grey shell with white lines.Near the front of it you see a big black half of a ball on where your looking at, before you realize that the ball is a face, near the top of the doorway, which you think is, about 20 feet high. Under them, you see what appears to be a tall beetle with what appears to be two pincers on its back with its antennas on the top of its head, wearing red robes. In front of it, you see what appears to be a man who looks like some out of Hollywood with combed back hair and a stubbed beard and mustache, wearing a blue suit of sorts with golden dashes where the shoulder blades are. Next to him, you see a tall blue cybernetic elf in a red and white sweater, who's had his right arm replaced with an artificial limb. On the edges of his face and some parts of the top of his head, you notice that there are pieces of metal across his head, fitting in alongside his scales. His eyes are noticeably different, with them both being a bright blue light instead of there being eyes there. The smallest of the group was a bear cub on its hind legs, with it as tall as your knees. There seems to be a black goo surrounding each of them, yet it doesn't seem to be harming it, rather, it seems that the cub is using the parasite as arms. Unsure of their names for now, you decide to settle on making your own names for them until you find out their name. But before you can decide, the one who called your holder Mary talks to you, with him looking like his composure is about to break "Your grace, my name is Alexi Brown of the Ascended Species, those that you personally guided. It is an honor, to meet you."

------------------------------------------------------------

Greetings Readers, this is my first story here. If you have any ideas on how to improve, please post it in the comments, so I can improve it.

[mommyhorror]

my take on the woo woo/spiritual woman vs logical/atheist woman is really that both sides have been making good points (but if I’m being honest the logic girlies are winning…. I’m just defensive of spirituality and the women who are also defending it. I’ll explain in next paragraph.) and that sometimes it hurts to see how condescending we all can get towards one another when engaging in debate or even just sharing thoughts. it’s like I love that piercing anger when it feels like radblr is united on some feminist cause, but a little disappointed at seeing how people speak to each other when we disagree. But I guess all’s fair in sharing ideas on tumblr.

I don’t feel particularly strong on either side because I’ve come to define “spiritual” more like. we are our bodies, we are connecting with our bodies and with our breath, and nature, etc. we are one with nature, basically. And that “oneness” IS “god.” So there, to me, is no separation. We are all “god” as much as we are beings. Alive. To me it’s not woo woo because I haven’t come up with some vision of some imagined higher power, I don’t worship…anything tbh. I stopped thinking worship was valid while leaving the Catholic Church….. I am simply honoring and respecting and revering what I am, the world I am a part of, other people, animals, plants, etc. (I feel like that’s what goddess worship was tbh? If it has to do with women realizing the magnitude of the female body we can observe here, how amazing it is, what “powers” the female body has to create life etc etc.. but idk). So to me It’s a debate against/between two sides of the same coin, especially when the atheist/logic side say they feel a connection with nature without it being spiritual, and the spiritual side says their belief brings meaning to the realism of nature. anyways that’s my take

[solspina]

Sanguinius is my favorite primarch, yet we have so little lore on his actual backstory. Do you have any headcanons about Baal or Baal’s culture 🥺?

Hello anon! I do actually have a few headcanons about baal and quite a few others about how sanguinius grew up in its environment!

i’m incredibly happy to answer your ask, especially considering that it’s about my favorite primarch too. never hesitate to ask again, this was really fun to write!

─── ⋆⋅ ♰ ⋅⋆ ───

Environment:

I think that the surface of Baal would be a lot like that of Mars.

It’s a very dry, rocky, and hot planet.

I don’t have many headcanons about Baal itself, but Baal Secundis, the second moon of the planet where Sanguinius was raised isn’t much different from the mother planet.

Other than the fact it’s absolutely plagued with radiation and some of the most hideous creatures ever seen.

It’s been mentions in lore a few times that Sanguinius thinks his wings may be a result of the radioactive environment.

Because of this, I think that Baal Secundis is very fallout-like.

Miles and miles of empty and desolate desert, perhaps occasionally some leftover pieces of armor from previous battles, and many, many bones.

Culture:

It’s also canon that Sanguinius was alone in the desert for what you can assume was a pretty decently long time.

He was found either as a very young adult or as an old teenager, probably naked and highly radioactive.

The planet was incredibly war infested as also told by lore, so I can imagine that the tribe Sanguinius was raised in caused him to do a fair share of fighting.

I believe that the war may have possibly been due to a clash of cultures.

Many sources state that the people lived in a Nomadic culture, they were travelers, scavengers even.

For the longest time, the people of Baal had no god to believe in, nothing to tie them together.

But by the end of his time on the planet, everyone worshiped Sanguinius. He had brought them peace and togetherness under his name.

Lore also states that the culture and current customs on Baal are HEAVILY influenced by the angel.

There are holidays after him.

Culture is one of those things that has a million aspects, but my favorite to consider is obviously weddings!

I think that weddings were merely a concept before sanguinius arrived, but once he had and the people learned it was okay to love, couples united together left and right.

He used to attend more official and political weddings on baal, even going as far as to officiate a few of them. Now, this is handled by Dante.

At modern baalian weddings, women tend to string white feathers in their hair as a symbol of protection and honor from Sanguinius.

Much like a traditional American wedding, brides also wear white as a symbol of purity, something the angel had honored. The difference? Husbands wear white too!

Guests are to wear whatever they wish, as long as it honors the primarch, but the bride’s jewelry is traditionally gold.

engagement rings are ALWAYS made of ruby, to symbolize both the blood of sanguinius and a blood covenant between husband and wife.

I think that it’s also a coming of age event for all male Baalians who wish to be accepted by their tribes to make a journey to the sarcophagus of Sanguinius at their coming of age, probably naked to simulate what the angel himself had to go and fight through as a child.

Many young men hope that when they arrive they will hear his voice, or that the luckiest will receive a vision from his spirit within the warp.

Has Sanguinius seen any of them as worthy enough to see his spirit? That’s for you to decide ;)

[helaelaemond]

For your Kinktober, may I please request Billy fucking his ex-girlfriend? They see each other again somewhere (maybe a party with mutual friends). Clothed sex, some dry humping if possible, Billy being possessive. You can make this dark if you want. Thank you, ily ♡

HELAELAEMOND'S KINKTOBER

Pairing:  Billy Washington x ex girlfriend!reader

Word count: 3.5k

Summary: it's the first time you've seen Billy since you've been back in the UK. It's an old friend's engagement party, and the love of your life - the one you lost - is there.

Part of It's All For You Billy!verse - reader and Billy were childhood friends, and on the cusp of adulthood, they took their friendship to a deep and meaningful love. However, as the years went by, reader tried harder and harder to build a better life despite life pushing back, whilst Billy let it overwhelm him. Despite their good relationship, reader wanted more from life than what he could offer, and she took a job overseas that he couldn't follow her to. In the years apart, he found Becky, and things got worse. Much worse. Cransted happened two years ago now, and reader is back in London, ready to continue her better life.

Dry humping, breast worship/nipple play, praise, penetrative sex

Content warning(s): infidelity, rough sex, choking, spitting, dubcon elements, angst

KINK CATEGORIES: Infidelity, clothed sex, possessiveness

Rating: E

Masterlist

"Hey, here she is!"

You laugh in delight as the front door is opened by your old friend Tommy, and he throws his arms around you. "Alright, mate?"

"God, you're a sight for sore eyes! Come on in! Party's started!"

You remember this house. It's where your afterprom happened, ten years ago now. In the front room is where Billy kissed you for the first time. Tommy used to live here with his parents, but they sold it to him a few years ago for a steal, and so it's here that his engagement party is happening. How so much can change. How so much stays the same.

His girlfriend - no, fiancée - is one of your old friends, too, and Sofia greets you. She remarks on how much the Balearics have agreed with you and you laugh at the praise. You hand her the bottle of prosecco you've come armed with and she thanks you cheerful. Together, you go to the kitchen and begin pouring it into plastic flutes. She tasks you with passing them round the guests, many of whom you know from back in the day, and you do it happily.

It's been years since you've seen most of them, but here in this house, in this time of joy, it feels like no time has passed at all. All the faces blur into one after a while. It's nice, but it's also a little overwhelming. Thankfully, most people are gathered in the kitchen and garden, and you slip into the front room for a moment of solitude. Without looking, you close the door and press your forehead against it to take in a deep breath.

"Oh. Um. Hi."

You freeze.

It's him.

Fuck.

Fuck.

Swallowing, you turn around and plaster a stiff smile on your face. "Billy! Hi!"

There's a can of Stella in his hands and he's doing his best to appear relaxed on the sofa, but the way that he taps the top of it gives him away. "How's it going?"

You could die right there, you really could. After everything, he's asking... how it's going? "It's good, it's good!" The sweetness in your voice is sticky. "Just got back, so it's kind of crazy, moving into a new place, you know, but it's exciting!"

"Hmm." He lifts his eyebrows as he nods slightly. "Yeah, heard you were back. Mum told me you stopped by hers looking for me."

You grit your teeth. Hopefully, your smile doesn't turn to a grimace. "I didn't know where else to look. And as you blocked me on everything, there wasn't much else I could do."

"You didn't have to look for me."

"I can go, if my presence is really bothering you." This is not the Billy that you missed - bitter, miserable. This is the one you tried to stop him from becoming. Maybe the old Billy is in there somewhere, but...

"Wait!" Your hand is on the doorknob when he stands up suddenly. "No, don't. I'm sorry. I just... it's a bit much."

"I didn't know you were in here, I swear," you reply softly. "I just needed a moment to myself."

He nods in understanding. "Sit with me. I won't be a dick, I promise."

"Don't make a promise you can't keep." But your words are kinder now, the grimace gone. You sit down on the sofa together, and he offers you his can. You take a grateful sip from it. It's bitter. You haven't had a Stella since you left him. God, the taste makes a whole world rush back. The tears in your eyes are sudden and stinging; you blink them away as best you can.

"I regretted it for a long time, you know?"

"What did you regret, Billy?"

His head is against the back of the sofa and his eyes are closed. The slope of his throat is smooth, the line of his Adam's apple so familiar. Memories of kissing him there flood your mind, making it hard to concentrate. His hair is the same as it always was, dusky blond and soft, flopping over his forehead. How sweet he used to sound when you pulled it.

"Not trying harder for you."

"Oh, Billy-"

"I shouldn't have let you go."

"It's all in the past now."

Licking his lips, he looks over at you. "Is it?"

You nod sadly. "Too much has happened."

"Like what?" And then, he takes the beer from your hand and puts it on the floor, and his knuckles brush your thigh. "Looking at you now feels like before."

You stand up as anger rises in you, sadness, too. "It's a memory you want, not a future."

"No, it's not."

"I know you, Billy. You want something that's easy, and memories are easier than reality."

"Don't be like that."

You face him, standing in front of him, and any softness has left you now. "I know about Becky, Billy. I know about it all."

He looks down. He's not wearing a ring. "I don't wanna talk about that."

The thin grasp on your emotions breaks. "I waited for you! When I left you, I told you that one day, I'd come back, and until then, I'd wait for you! That I'd build a life for myself that you can be a part of if you waited for me, too! And you didn't wait!"

"I wanted to. But-"

"But what?"

"How could I have believed someone better wouldn't come along?"

You blink and straighten up. "You wanted someone better?"

"No!" he says in alarm. "No, I mean someone better for you! God, I mean, look at you! You're... you're everything, and I'm just... just-"

"You were everything to me, Billy. And I waited, I fucking waited. There's been no one since you, not even a date. And yet I come back home after building the life I promised you, to find that you're married and with a kid!"

His eyes are getting red. He licks his lips and nods almost nervously. "Yeah, I'm married. To a woman I don't love, with a kid that's gonna grow up to hate me."

"Is that supposed to make me pity you?"

"I don't need anyone's pity, least of all yours."

With his words ringing in your ears, you turn on your heel and storm out of the room, slamming the door behind you. He kissed you for the first time in that room. It's not the first time he's broken your heart, though.

Sofia catches you on her way to the loo, and sees the anger in your face. She drags you upstairs into her bedroom, and you tell her about Billy. She comforts you, reassuring you that yes, this is her engagement party, but you're her friend, and she doesn't mind that you need her now.

When Billy appears in the doorway, she stands in front of you protectively. Assuring her it's alright, she reluctantly leaves you to it.

"But if you make her cry," she warns on her way out, "I will castrate you, William."

The use of his proper name makes you smile faintly. But then his gaze is on you and you're alone again, and he locks the door and it makes you shiver.

He locks the door.

He locks the door.

"What more is there possibly to say?" you ask defensively.

"I need you to understand."

"Understand what?"

This time, it's you that's sitting and him who's looming over you. He's so fucking tall, it could kill you. He used to be so heavy atop you, and you used to wonder if he would crush you. What a way to go, you used to think.

"What happened with Becky."

"Why do you want me to understand?"

He looks at you darkly. "You know."

And you do. It sends a thrill through you. "Then talk."

"The day you left, it's like... it's like something died. I knew you'd have this great life, and I'd never be a part of it again, and that killed me. Do you get that? You were the best part of me, and you left."

"I told you I'd come-"

He holds up his hand to silence you, and you hate how easily it works. His hand is so big. It used to wrap so easily around your throat. You swallow.

"So I fucked my way through the next year to forget you. And you know what? Every single girl I got drunk enough to fuck turned into you. I don't know how many of them heard me say your name. Every single one of them had the same colour hair as you, so when I took them from behind, I could imagine you."

It should make you sick. It's warped, but it makes heat bolt between your legs.

"Then Becky came along. Opposite of you. She looks nothing like you, acts nothing like you, too. We hated each other, but loved each other, too. You and me, we... we were stable. Steady. Becky offered something different. We shouldn't have stayed together, and we broke up for a bit, but then... Cransted."

"You don't have to talk about that." Your voice is softer now. "Your mum told me everything."

"No, no, it's good for me to talk about. That's what Lana says. And my therapist." He takes in a deep breath and continues. "I wasn't ready to die. And in that car, so many thoughts were running through my head. Of course, you were one of them."

You look down at your hands in your lap. What can you possibly say to that?

"Me and Becky got married a month after that. I didn't know what else to do with myself, and we were both fucking scared. We weren't careful and she got pregnant."

"You always wanted to be a dad."

"With the right woman, yeah." He sinks to his knees in front of you, and it's impossible not to notice his dark expression.

'You shouldn't talk like that. She's your wife."

"I wish she wasn't."

He rests his forheead on your bare knee. He pushes the skirt of your dress up. It makes your thighs tense. "Don't."

"I'll do whatever I want."

You stand up angrily. You'll leave him here just like you did in the living room, you don't care-

Before you can unlock the door, Billy presses you against it, his face inches from yours. "You didn't want anyone else but me, did you?"

"That's over now."

"No, it's not." He presses his knee between your thighs and you try not to shiver at the pressure.

"Let me go, Billy!" You hit his chest and try to push him away, but he catches your wrists and pins them above your head.

"You belong to me, don't you?"

"I belong to myself!"

"If that's true, why didn't you look for anyone else? It's been years, baby."

God, how much you used to love that pet name. He'd call you his baby girl, his pretty thing, his sweetheart, while you sucked his cock like you needed it to breathe. Even now, it makes you suck in air.

"Because I was waiting. There's nothing to wait for anymore."

"Liar." And then his lips are on your neck. He lifts up his leg, and your hips grind down. It's instintive. It's desperate.

"Fuck you," you whimper.

"That's it," he encourages. "Let me give you what you need."

"I don't need anything from you."

"Hmm. Such an attitude now." One of his large hands easily pins both of yours above your head, and the other wraps around your neck. Slender fingers find their old place against the vein under your skin, and he presses against it until you feel light-headed. Your eyes droop slightly, and he lets go with a smug smile. "That's it, baby. You gonna admit you want this, now?"

"I don't."

"Don't say that," he whispers against your ear. "It makes my dick hard."

Shivers go through you again. You grind harder against his thigh. "You're sick in the head."

"Sick for you."

"What about your wife?"

And then, he kisses you.

It's rough and deep, his tongue on the inside of your teeth, his lips hard and demanding. You both moan, both your hearts are racing. He forgets about the hand keep you in place, and instead, he uses both of his to yank down the neckline of your dress.

"Fuck, look at you." It's uncomfortable for a moment as he pushes your bra down, but you shrug your shoulders free of the straps, and then his hands pull you free and his fingers are squeezing you just like they used to. Your head drops back against the door, and his familiar mouth finds its way over your breast. He kisses your soft skin, biting and licking across the swell of your flesh until his lips find your hard nipple.

"Remember how I used to make you come from this alone?" he murmurs around your breast.

"No," you protest half-heartedly. Of course you remember. Over the years, you've tried to make yourself finish just by playing with your nipples, but it never worked. Not like it worked with him. "Stop it, we can't-"

"We are."

"Billy-"

"Fuck," he grunts. He pulls away his leg from between yours before grabbing your hips and lifting you up. "I need more."

"Please," you beg. Your body responds before you can even think about it, and you wrap your legs around his waist. He bends down his head to suck on your nipple against as he begins thrusting against you. Through your underwear, and his soft trouers, you can feel his hard cock grind against your cunt.

"Oh, my God," he moans. "God, you feel so good, baby."

"We have to stop!" you beg. But your legs are too tight around him. He grinds against you desperately, like a man possesesd.

"Mine. My pretty girl, you're where you belong. Look at me, now."

Dropping your head against the door, you look at him with heavily-lidded eyes. His cheeks are flushed, his forehead damp. His lip twitches as he thrusts against you.

"Open your mouth."

"No."

"Yes."

"No," you hiss.

With one arm still holding you firmly against the door, he grasps your face and presses your cheeks. It hurts so fucking much and it forces your jaw open. He spits into your mouth. Disgusting. You swallow gratefully.

"That's it," he praises lowly. "You're gonna make me come just doing this, baby."

"Don't call me that." Pleasure is mounting in you already. Just from dry humping, like you're teenagers again. But he makes you feel like a virgin again. And him calling you that doesn't help cool your passion.

"Why not?" He stills his thrusts. "Does it make your clit hard?"

It's impossible to hold back your moan. "Let me go."

He obliges - for a moment. Billy lets you go only to set your feet back on the ground, and then he spins you to press your face against the door, and he pushes up your dress. When he can't push your underwear to the side as much as he wants, he yanks it down. When you refuse to comply with taking it off, he just tears it. It leaves red marks on your thighs, the violent action, and you almost come from the senstation alone.

Fuck Billy Washington.

"God, I can smell you," he groans against your ear. "Did you think about me when you touched yourself for all those years apart?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?" Glancing over your shoulder, you can't hold back a choked moan. He only pushes down his joggers - couldn't even wear a nice pair of jeans for his mates' party, pathetic - enough to free his cock, and it's as perfect as you remember.

He notices how your mouth hangs open at the sight. "You want it in your sweet mouth, baby?"

"No," you whine.

"Do you suck on dildos and think of me?"

"No."

"I think you do," Billy whispers. Into your hair he presses his forehead, and he looks down as he bends you forward. You resist only a little - and then he's there, pushing you open. "Fuck, you're so perfect."

Tears spring in the corner of your eyes from the absolute need he's driving into you, body and soul. He's not yours anymore - but, God, you're still his. "Billy!"

"I wish you could feel how good you feel," he praises with a strained voice. Once he's fully sheathed inside you, he pauses, as if to drink it all in. "So fucking wet for me. So relaxed. You need this, don't you?"

Resting your head on the door, you shake it. "Fuck you."

"Hmm." He bites your ear and then blows into it, making goosebumps rise along your flesh. "Try again, baby."

"Fuck you."

"You want me to stop?"

You don't reply. The only response he gets is your strained breathing. And then, after a long moment, "no."

"Let me hear it."

You shake your head.

"Please," he whispers, nearly shaking from the restraint it takes to not lose control. "Please say those words I've missed. It'll be so good for you, my sweet girl."

Sweet girl. Baby. It's ridiculous, you know, but those names undo you. "Please," you beg. "Fuck me."

And he does.

He fucking does.

The pace he sets is relentless and brutal. He has to clamp his hand over your mouth to keep you quiet as he pounds into you again and again, pushing you higher and higher. You bite his palm and fingers in an attempt to stay silent, and the pain you cause makes him hiss.

But it doesn't matter. He's buried inside of you, his hands are all over you, and he's here, he's here, he's here. Billy, your Billy.

"Never again," he grunts between thrusts. "Not letting you go."

"Not leaving," you promise against his hand. Tears are rolling down your cheeks from the stinging pleasure of his cock, from how brutally high he's pushing you, from the years of frustration without him.

"Who do you belong to?"

"You," you babble mindlessly. "And you're mine."

"God, yes, I am," he promises.

The sound of your wet skin slapping together fills the bedroom. Downstairs, the thumping bass of the party hides your noises, you hope. He pushes two fingers into your mouth and you suck on them greedily. He gags you on them just for the delight of hearing you choke. Then he runs them, wet from your spit, down to your freed breast, and rolls your nipple between them. Carefully, he pulls on it, and it's a stark contrast to how hard he's fucking your pussy.

"Close," you moan. "Billy, yes, yes, don't stop, please-! Please-!"

His hard and fast pace is so much. He grunts against your ear, and then his nose is in your hair, and he bites your ear. "C'mon, baby, come on my cock!"

"Touch me," you beg.

And then his fingers are crooked around your clit, flicking and squeezing just how you always liked, and it has you higher and higher and tighter and tighter and the feeling won't let up and you're close, so close, there can't be anywhere else to go-!

"Billy! Billy! B-!" Your orgasm crashes over you in waves that spread through your whole body. You're spiralling, falling, writhing with it, your heart racing and pleasure exploding between your thights, up your chest, over your scalp. Your choked noises make your throat raw, the intensity makes your cheeks wet.

With your cunt still clenching and relaxing in increible aftershocks, Billy pulls out just in time to spill. Roughly, he bites your shoulder to keep quiet, but his name is on your lips. You feel him tremble behind you, how his knees are going weak.

You both stand there for a long moment, your back against his chest, his head in the crook of your neck. Slowly, he pulls your dress back down, and he pushes himself back into his trousers. After that, his hands find your waist. You try to pull away, but he won't let you go.

"Stay," he whispers. "With me."

"Billy," you murmur. The reality of what has just happened begins to sink in. "This... can't happen again."

"It will, though."

When you turn to face him, there is no regret in his face. "It can't."

He strokes your hair back from your face in a gesture that feels just as intimate as what just happened. "I won't let you go again."

"You're married."

"I'll leave her."

"You have a child."

"I love you more."

You shake your head. "You don't mean that."

He doesn't smile. 'What if I do?"

"I... you shouldn't. It's wrong."

"Don't care."

"Billy. You can't leave your wife."

"So you're happy to let me cheat on her with you?"

You wince. "This was a mistake."

"The only mistake either of us made was me letting you go. And I'm never, ever, doing that again." His blue eyes are intense, bearing into you as if he's searching your very soul.

"Never?"

He kisses your forehead. "No matter the cost. Never again."

[hrefna-the-raven]

Hot as Hades

Masterlist - Misc. masterlist

Chapters 1 - 2 - 3 - 4

Words: 2047

Chapter 5 - The party

"Olympus", you murmured, blinking several times, half-expecting to find yourself back in your own home, awakening from a dream.

However, you soon realized that this was not a figment of your imagination. The clouds beneath your feet felt both soft and stable as you cautiously took a few steps, constantly reminding yourself that the ground wouldn't give way beneath you. The atmosphere around you seemed different, pleasantly warm with a gentle breeze, and the light enveloping you resembled the soothing rays of sunshine on your skin. Your eyes scanned the surroundings as you made your way through the grand golden entrance, briefly pausing to acknowledge the small blue deity who greeted you with a mischievous wink behind his red-tinted sunglasses. Hades whispered sweet reassuring words to you, telling you to just be yourself as you kept on walking towards the gathering of the other gods. Amidst the whirlwind of thoughts racing through your mind, your gaze flitted from one divine figure to another, almost oblivious to Hades engaging in conversation with no other than Zeus himself. It wasn't until Hades' smug voice broke through the chaos that you were fully present once again.

"How sentimental. You know, I haven't been this choked up since I got a hunk of moussaka caught in my throat."

Given the overwhelming amount of first contacts with the entire Greek pantheon and the fact that you were thrown into this without a warning, it was only a matter of time before something inside you snapped and that moment was apparently now. You could, for mere seconds, feel the pressure inside your chest building up before it burst, all your thoughts washed away within an instant, leaving only the pure esssence of your very being, which was admittedly not the side you wanted to show to literal gods but here you were, having no choice and at this very exact moment in time, you stopped giving fucks. So, without any warning or possibility to react on your own, your body started laughing. Your hand searching Hades' as a warm wave of giggles and laughter bubbled out of you, your fingers gently intertwining with his. You playfully nuzzled your head against his arm, wearing a loving and amused smile in response to his joke. Every god on Mount Olympus watched you with curiosity as you were giggling away at the joke of that one god everyone agreed on is not funny. As soon as you realised that no one else joined in the laughter, you cleared your throat, tightened your grip on Hades' hand, and spoke almost in a whisper.

"So I guess it's more of a mosaic than an audience."

Zeus shot you a glance before slapping Hades' shoulder, leading him away from you.

"Brother, I have no clue how you managed to find that one but I'd keep her close if I were you, you won't find another one like that", the sound of his exaggerated laughter piercing through your skull in the most uncomfortable way despite the distance.

You knew all about Zeus from the stories being told and you met a lot of people worshipping him, he was THE god after all but from what you'd seen, something deep within you had already decided that he was definitely not making it on your good list. You couldn't exactly pinpoint yet why but you were sure you did not like Zeus and you were even more sure that you'd never let anyone know, just to be on the safe side. Without Hades by your side you suddenly felt a void within you, as if you were lost in the midst of the vibrant festivities. Anxious and restless, you found yourself nervously fidgeting with your hands, unsure of what to do until a smaller blue-skinned god flew towards you.

"Well hello, lovely little mortal", he greeted you, circling around you while peering at you through his red-tinted sunglasses, "are you enjoying our fabulous party? Say you and the old grumpy guy", he nodded towards Hades, "you know, I haven't seen this much love in a room since Narcissus discovered himself."

You offered a timid smile to the god, avoiding direct eye contact, uncertain of the appropriate response.

"Oh my, babe, excuse me, where are my manners", he exclaimed, feigning shock before swiftly reaching out to shake your hand, "I'm Hermes, nice meeting you, finally, we've heard so much about you."

With a sincere smile, Hermes then flew away. Just as you were about to utter a response, he returned to your side, presenting you with a goblet containing a mysterious red liquid.

"Isn't this...?", you began, unsure if it would be wise to vocalise the remainder of your sentence.

Hermes simply nodded, placing the goblet in your hands.

"But wouldn't this make me...?"

He slyly winked at you before glancing at Aphrodite, who stood beside Hephaestus, a mischievous smile playing on her lips as she observed your conversation with Hermes from the corner of her eye.

"I can't, I mean what about", your voice dropped to a whisper as you gestured toward Zeus, who currently had Hades locked in a tight embrace, clearly without the latter's approval. Hermes casually waved his hand, dismissing your concern, and drew you closer, his arm gently encircling your waist as he led you over to Aphrodite, urging you to take a sip.

"Sometimes not even the big guy manages to control everything and on other times he doesn't know when to make an exception and both moments eventually happen on the same occasion. Hey Aphrodite, honey, be a dear and take care of our little mortal while I go over to annoy his flaming grumpiness."

"So, Hades, you finally made it. How are things in the underworld? How are things with the mortal world?", Zeus asked, nudging the Lord of the Dead.

"Well, they're just fine. You know, a little dark, a little gloomy. And, as always, hey, full of dead people. What are you gonna do? As for the mortal, Zeusy, darling, dearest brother, I would actually have a tinsy tiny request. You know from god to god, from bro to bro."

Zeus instantly took a step backward, the cheerful expression on his face faltering, replaced by something grim.

"You know the rules", Zeus sighed, "you know I can't make an exception."

"But you made the rules!", Hades almost shouted, the flames on his head threatening to turn into a fiery orange.

"Hades no! And that will be my last answer! I understand your position  but the answer is no!"

"But-"

"No! The rules are for everyone. It's not like one could just change the fabric of reality and change it to whatever outcome one wishes for."

Hades mumbled a curse under his breath, carefully quiet so his brother wouldn't hear it while moving away when his steps halted at the sight of Hermes wrapping his arm around you.

"What in the undead is this?!", he growled, flames shifting to a fiery orange in an instant burst of anger.

He stomped towards you, his already barely existing sense of calm completely shattered for the remainder of the day. Taking a deep breath, he prepared himself to unleash his fury on that infuriating and insignificant excuse for a god, when suddenly, the same god turned and flew towards him.

"Hey H, darling, listen I just ha-"

Hades shoved him out of the way and, as he reached you, ignoring Aphrodite and Hephaestos, his slender fingers tightly gripped your wrist and he pulled you away from the party, not stopping until you both reached the gleaming golden gate.

"I'm sorry babe, this was a mistake. I don't understand why he can never gra-", Hades abruptly stopped mid-sentence, his eyes widening as a sudden realisation struck him, "I need to head to the Underworld!"

"What? Why? I mean I'm not overly comfortable being here but if you want to stay, I have no pro-"

Hades hushed you by pressing his finger on your lips. The warmth of his skin on yours almost made you shiver, channeling all your mental strength to not let your thoughts drift away.

"Trust me, I'll explain everything somewhen, later maybe, okay? Right, well", he winked and turned around to address the other gods, "ok guys listen, I'd love to stay. But unlike you gods lounging about up here, I regretfully have a full-time job that you, by the way, so charitably bestowed on me, Zeus. So, can't. Love to, but can't. Bye bye."

As the Lord of the Underworld placed his hands around your waist, pulling you closer to leave, he Zeus interrupted.

"Aw, Hades, don't be such a stiff. Join the celebration. You haven't even heard the big announcement yet."

"As if I'd care", Hades muttered, rolling his eyes, before finally disappearing with you.

You found yourself standing in your own bedroom, Hades taking a few steps away from you before he vanished without uttering another word. Your hands trembled slightly as the events of tonight flooded through your mind. It was already strange enough to be courted by the Ruler of the Underworld but within a few nights from your first encounter, you met the whole pantheon, two gods basically made you immortal whereas the one god you loved suddenly brought you back and left without any real explanation. Were you truly immortal now? You felt no different than earlier this evening, besides all the excitement and stress cursing through your body. And what was up with Hades? Would he even know about the nectar? Was it his plan? Did he feel that you were becoming immortal? Did he now reject you at the sudden thought of having you forever? Sudden doubts were gnawing at your heart, even though he has given you no reason to feel this way. But he was a god, and despite the nectar, you probably still felt like a mortal in his eyes. Perhaps to him, you were nothing more than a temporary amusement, easily discarded after a short while. No no no, you refused to accept this. Frustrated, you let out a groan in an attempt to push these thoughts away.

There was something between you and the Lord of the Underworld, something words couldn't explain, a warm feeling engulfing both of you as soon as you were together and you could sense that he felt it too, despite his divine nature and immense power. The affection in his eyes always made itself known. Yet the lack of an explanation bothered you but, for now, you'd put your trust in him and tried to wait patiently for him to return to you. Closing your eyes, you let out a trembling sigh and focused on a single thought, repeating it like a heartfelt prayer. Please stay by my side, please...

Hades was in the middle of hammering detailed instructions into the presumably empty heads of Pain and Panic when your prayer reached him. His voice broke off, silence filling the room as the ache in his heart took over, the sadness in your plea piercing through it like thousand daggers. The guilt of leaving you like that was already eating at him but he couldn't reveal his plan to you, not yet, if Zeus would get the idea that you had been his accomplice you'd punished, cursed or worse. Hades shook his head, he would never allow to let anyone or anything harm you, now that he found you and especially after the Fates' prophecy, he'd do anything to keep you with him.

"Uh Lord Hades?", Pain cautiously asked, exchanging nervous looks with Panic who tried to hide behind him.

His gaze shot to the two imps, his hair flaring up with a hint of orange.

"What are you two still doing here?! You have your instructions so get out of my sight before I maim you!", he screamed.

Pain and Panic shrieked, crashing into each other before scurrying out of the room. Hades slumped on his throne, groaning in frustration as he massaged his temples. They would fuck it up but, unless like all the other times, he was actually counting on it for his plan to work out. This is doomed, the thought invaded his mind, this was doomed the moment love was involved...

Chapter 6

[thescarlettbitch]

Worshipping Inanna / Ishtar

This is an informative post about how Inanna was worshipped, or believed to be worship, back in her time, and at the end I'll share how I worship her.

Ritual sex - her high priestess would have ritual sex (whether it was true sex or symbolic is unknown) with the new king to ensure his fortune.

Gender non-conformity - her cult was primarily composed of those outside the binary, and shows men and women adopting the opposing dialect and engaging in sex with each other.

Music and art - most of her myths are in the form of Hymns, and most of her followers were artists, musicians, or dancers. Specifically, war dances would be done in her temple.

Libations - a libation is the ritualistic act of pouring a liquid offering straight from a container onto the earth. In depictions, the person doing the offering was naked.

Unfortunately, due to the passage of time, many specific rituals have been lost. I've scoured and this is really all I can find about her ancient original worship, and a lot of it is disputed because no one knows what was a metaphorical ritual or an actual ritual.

That being said, here is how I worship her in the modern day.

Self-confidence - Inanna was not one to be meek, it is said by many experts and proven in her myths that she was headstrong and didn't care how she was perceived. To honor her, I wear whatever I want. I have a very alternative style and I used to fear people looking at me. She has helped silence my worry and in turn, helped me gain confidence.

Non-conformity - I'm nonbinary, and although my femininity is a major part of my identity, so is masculinity, and so is androgyny. Learning that she had a queer cult following was so liberating, as before learning that I felt like it was wrong of me to work with her. So every little thing I do that isn't in the social construct of the gender binary is for her.

Libations - lucky for me, this is one area of her ancient worship that can be done in a modern setting. I don't have a "proper" container, I just use a normal glass. I've done it with water, coffee, tea, lemonade, and even kool-aid.

Honey/Butter cakes - in, I believe, Inanna and The God Of Wisdom, Enki welcomes her with honey/butter cakes and alcohol. I have only made a honey cake once before and it was shit, but I plan on trying again soon to combine both into a honey bourbon cake. I know they didn't have bourbon back then, but it's a local good I can find and adds a personal touch.

Self love - my fiancé lives across an ocean, so some things we can't do together (both living with family and thin walls), so to honor and worship her, self love is a great way for those in similar situations and she enjoys it from what I've seen.

Offerings - usually dates, sometimes cherries, often lemonade or tea, and more recently honey whiskey. These offerings might not be "traditional" in style, but they work for me and her. I have a small glass from an old Costco tiramisu and an iridescent bowl I got half off at our local grocery, both have an 8pointed star on them. Usually I sit them out for days at a time, or at least over night, and then either ingest them or just toss it in the trash (any other alternative isn't doable in my current situation)

Music - I listen to a variety of music with her, songs about sex, love, anger, fighting, injustice. She loves it, and if you want more detail on this I have a post about the songs on her playlist here.

Driving with the windows down - I love driving, and I feel like doing so with the windows down is an easy multitasking way to cleanse myself and invite good vibes in. Usually I do this while playing her playlist.

Making posts - it may seem a little silly, but a way I honor her is keeping her and her family alive. They are old deities, their civilizations and worshippers lived about 6,000 years ago, and some of her family have had their names lost to time. Making posts about them helps get word out, and keep them "alive".

Digital temples - I play the sims 4 and I saw someone talk about how they wanted to make a temple to their goddess in the game, so... I'm making my own. And will probably have my sims "worship" her via a club. Some people don't see this as an act of worship, but I do. As @thrashkink-coven said in this post, the gods are as modern as they are ancient. I know she enjoys it.

I will go through and make a full post detailing specific UPGs (personal practice things not backed in historical fact) with her, for anyone interested.

[youremyheaven]

Any word of advice for Sun girlies how to protect herself from evil eye?

light bubble meditation!! always visualise a circle of light around yourself. one of the best ways to build your "aura" or cultivate magnetism is to have an energy shield around you at all times. it's not rocket science, just close your eyes and visualise light surrounding you and keeping you protected.

some of the next tips are a little out there but if you're so inclined do try them:

Basil/Tulsi is known for its cleansing properties and we use it a lot in India. I recommend putting a stem of basil in your pillow (my nightmares went away after I did this) or putting a stem of basil in your bra when you go out (or your pocket). It's a powerful remedy against evil eye.

Consecrate an object of your choice, preferably something small and dainty (a crystal, a sea shell, a pebble, a feather, you don't want to pick something that carries any karmic energy) by chanting to it, meditating with it and suffusing it with your energy. Then carry it with you everywhere, in your bag or purse or whatever. It's like a good luck charm that's custom made for u

Pray to your Ishta devata. Sally Kempton talks a lot about goddess worship and I suggest watching her videos or reading her book Awakening Shakti but this is life changing!!! Obviously its not wise to casually dabble in Hinduism and deity worship so please study them, read as much as you can and gather as much info as you can. You'll naturally feel drawn to one Goddess over others and praying to her will keep you protected. Bhakti (devotion) is the greatest armour. I have called upon the goddess during times of immense turmoil and she's always helped me navigate with grace BUT you should never make a deity feel "used". If you're praying, pray everyday, not just when something goes wrong. Think of it as a relationship you build with someone. You have to show up and communicate with them everyday, only then will they want to be your aid in times of need. Give thanks. Always.

Black thread. I guess this could again count as appropriating Hinduism but 😬 compared to deity worship, this is nothing. Here's an article explaining it. Basically, wearing a black thread on your left leg will keep nazar away.

Burn incense/sage bc it purifies the energy of the space

SALT also cleanses. take a bath after mixing a few spoons of salt in the water and watch the effect it has on u.

The thing about evil eye is that it affects people who are spiritually fragile. They do not have an energy shield protecting them so they're susceptible to every kind of influence (they're easily influenced) and suffer the consequences of negativity more than others. Some people thrive in life no matter how much shit is thrown at them. Nothing affects them much. Others crumble easily in the face of even the smallest hardship or bitterness. That's bc they're spiritually weak. You have to build a spiritual base that is so strong nothing can shake you. Evil eye can't hurt you if your relationship with the divine is 💪🏼strong af bc God is bigger than any evil. And perhaps many of you dabble in astrology for fun and don't believe in God but vedic astrology kind of requires a relationship with the divine. Literally the remedy for any kind of issue in your birth chart is to pray.

I feel like many people have a passive understanding of prayer but it's a very purposeful exercise of faith. Finding time in your day and devoting it to God is a way to engage in conversation with yourself. If you hate/are afraid of God, that is a reflection of you and what you've been raised to believe. Once you really get into it, you'll understand that God is love and honestly prayer time is the happiest time of the day for me. My heart feels so full. Whenever I don't pray, I feel so closed off bc my heart is longing for that supreme love. You make your life feel purposeful by acting with intention and making the ordinary sacred and ritualising experiences. If you live like nothing matters, that's what will be reflected back. Your world and what you make of your experiences is a reflection of you 🫶 so make a temple of your mind

Sorry for long ramble but yk that's how I am by now 😌🤪

[alatismeni-theitsa]

https://www.lifo.gr/stiles/optiki-gonia/kaos-einai-i-shesi-mas-me-ti-mythologia

Can they stop with modern labels? Every time they try to say that ancient Greece was a queer paradise where it was far from this.

It was criticised in society unless the man was powerful and rich. Like it was a tiny minority and they create this narrative of ancient Greece have over 50% being queer or something.

It's time for our xenoi friends and followers to learn another Greek term. Xenolatreia. It means "worship of anything foreign (mainly from the western countries)", which is a widespread phenomenon among Greeks for the past 2 centuries. It's the following sentiment: "Anything that comes out of western countries is good and it should be praised because we here in Greece are a bunch of illiterate monkeys who live on trees, and cannot see the Deeper Message our Superior Westerners show."

Lifo has had some decent articles over the years but this one reeks of xenolatreia. Lifo supports that the Greeks hate the series because it has queer people in it. so it goes on a campaign to show that Greek mythology had queer people. Which, sure, I don't disagree, but it misses the point. While some Greeks surely have been offended just by the existence of queerness, Lifo misses the REAL reason why Greeks in large felt their mythology was butchered by KAOS. They even wrote it in the article themselves:

"Zeus is a paranoid authoritarian dictator in mid-life crisis who fears losing his power and murders his aides to vent. Hera is a promiscuous goddess who repeatedly betrays Zeus and has mutilated mute priestesses for protection. Dionysos is a spoiled and immature zoomer who, apart from pranks, indulges in orgies with all genders. Poseidon a sadistic god of the sea, who tortures the crew on his ship for fun. Prometheus is gay and killed his lover so he could overthrow Zeus. Orpheus is a famous pop singer and Eurydice does not love him. Theseus is black and gay. The Erinyes are tough-as-nails mechs that look like they stepped out of 'Sons of Anarchy'. The Fates resemble a three-member jury in a talent show. The Trojans are a terrorist group that acts against the gods. Crete is more reminiscent of California than the Mediterranean."

Queer and diverse identities in general are nothing bad. The way KAOS mixed everything into a salad is the real bad thing, and the showrunners hide behind the queer representation when they are met with any other kind of criticism. It's the same tactic Lifo follows here. Only extremely stupid people would have an issue if Ganymees and Zeus were a couple in the show when it was also a part of our mythology. The problem about KAOS for the larger population is not the queerness.

Lifo continues:

The idea we have of Greek myths is, at best, a jumble of bits and pieces created by the Greek school: Zeus has sexual relations with mortals, Hera is jealous, Dionysus engages in revelry, Persephone for some reason resides in Hades , a bird eats the flesh of Prometheus, Aphrodite is the most beautiful and Athena the wisest of the bunch, Artemis hunts, Apollo plays the lyre: a very general and vague idea, much more chaotic than the mixing of myths which "Kaos" attempts.

What a shitty argument. Did you pay any attention in school, I wonder?? Do you know that we know our myths also outside the Greek school and that the Greek school teaches based on the ancient sources, and we often read the ancient text itself?? Also, no, the situation here is not more absurd than what KAOS does. The mythology is what it is. KAOS takes an already established thing and makes a turd out of playdoh.

Instead, we demand that a series aiming for commercial appeal follow our preferred script line and stay true to what? In our own obsessions, revisions, angulations and Christian puritanisms?

To our freaking culture, dear Lifo. To the myths we wrote and passed down for two and a half millennia, dear Lifo. They are fairly widespread and they are very difficult to get wrong.

[broomsick]

Ways to incorporate music into deity work

Hi there, music enthusiasts! I'm here to help you blend what you're passionate about with what you're devoted to. After all, music has a particular, unique kind of divinity to it! It can dig deep into our souls and help us connect to our emotions in a way, I’m sure you'll agree, is nothing short of spiritual. And any historian will tell you that music is one of the oldest forms of art to have ever been performed by humans. Even back during the antiquity and through the eras that followed, it was very much one of the main mediums through which people would connect with religion. The homeric hymns were sung, galdr is generally considered to have been a musical practice involving ritual singing...

Now, I've learned with time that there are little offerings more rewarding than songs. Just like they can help us understand our own feelings, they're also a great way to communicate to other people the feelings we find hard to put into words. You'll know this if you've ever made a playlist for someone, or even written someone a song. Music is beautiful in that way. Offering a song to the Gods works in that same manner: if you're somebody who struggles with communicating their emotions, there's no reason you shouldn't be able to share a song with the Gods, like you would for a friend. You can play it and meditate on their image, or simply listen to it, eyes closed and fully focused on the music as an act of devotion. Even sing/play it, whatever feels right!

I personally like to assing certain songs to certain deities! That way, when a specific song seems to come up over and over on shuffle, I think that this or that deity might be trying to reach out to me! To associate a song with a God is to give this God an essence, an individual aura. The songs I associate with Freyja are generally confidence-boosters, those I associate with Baldr are most often peaceful and emotion-stirring... And this helps with picturing the Gods as separate entities, with their own, distinct spirits! Some might find it easier to connect with a deity during meditation or divination sessions when they play the deity's assinged song. In a way which is reminiscent of devotional candles, this might even become a means with which to invoke the God ("Hey there! I'm playing your song and thinking about you, you're invited to join me!")

And if, like me, you're an incurable nerd, you may go even further and practice this little exercise I love to engage in on public transport or during any other especially boring liminal times: stop looking at your phone, draw back into your imagination, play a song and imagine something. Is it a quiet forest? A vast expanse of snowy moutains? A night around a bonfire with friends? A bright day in a bustling city? Focus on whatever comes to mind. Do the feelings brought about by this image remind you of a deity you worship with? Two birds with one stone: enjoy a song, engage in deity work! It’s as simple as that.

I'm sure there are loads of other, more creative ways you all have found to connect with deity worship using music. Whatever these ideas are, feel free to share them! It’s always great to hear how other people practice, so let’s share!